WITCH DOCTOR #3

WITCH DOCTOR #3
Script by: Brandon Seifert
Illustrated by: Luka Ketner
Image Comics

How can such beauty be so freaking sick?
"The Patient from the Black Lagoon" is slabbed
(And gorgeous). Penny wants to do her trick
(She likes to eat those monsters) -- have I grabbed
Your fancy yet? Well, it's a Deep One, too!
Straight out of Lovecraft! Watch our Doctor get
All nerdy on the subject, crying "Ooh
His lungs are gone!" The chance for to dissect
A magic benthic dweller -- would you not
Geek out just like he did? Is it his fault
Things turn out badly? Poor wee Penny's got
So peckish... fetch some vampires from the vault!
Meanwhile, Cthulhu's tapeworms! History
Has ne'er been told so well, if  you ask me.

Sonneteer's note: "Cthulu's Tapeworms" is totally my new all-purpose epithet and swear word.

BEASTS OF BURDEN: NEIGHBORHOOD WATCH (ONE-SHOT)

BEASTS OF BURDEN: NEIGHBORHOOD WATCH (ONE-SHOT)
Script by Evan Dorkin
Illustrated by Jill Thompson
Dark Horse Comics

Who doesn't crave some cuteness now and then?
Throw in some funny, and what could it be
But Beasts of Burden! This is one which, when
I read it, leaves me wanting more. Here three
Short stories of brave dogs and kittehs who
Fight evil are presented. They take on
A chicken-stealing goblin, then into
The past they go: a mastiff fights the spawn
Of rooster and reptile, a basilisk,
Blindfolded, yea, and following his nose!
Last undead sheep bring on a sense of risk
In one of our pup friends, force him to close
His eyes and take a rest. O Evan, Jill,
This book of yours is such a pretty thrill!

Revival #1

Revival #1
Script by Tim Seely
Illustrated by Mike Norton
Image Comics

Farm noir, they say? So what's that even mean?
I'll tell you what. It's creepy on a scale
Both intimate and cosmic. There's a scene
Wherein a zombie grandma turns to flail
And kills with just a scythe sweep, doesn't care
Because her teeth keep growing back and she
Must yank them out, because she cannot bear
To be without her dentures. Which means we
Have not seen zombie horror quite like this.
The undead all remember, can still speak
And feel unholy. Meanwhile their small town
Is quarantined (but gorgeous!). Where it's weak
Is exposition dialogue. I frown
On this unsubtlety in what should be
The greatest zombie comic we may see.

Scott Sigler & Chad Minshew's INFECTED #1

INFECTED #1
Original novel by Scott Sigler
Script by Scott Sigler & Chad Minshew
Art & Cover by Chad Minshew

Blue triangles have haunted me before
They're subtle in this debut issue, though,
Subdued like all the colors. I adore
The tangramatic panels when doth blow
An early victim's house (by his design).
The characters look great, especially
The Dawson, just like he was in my mind.
One thing I didn't like too much to see
Was lots of caption exposition, which
This publisher allows too much. It's not
Real necessary either, is the bitch
The art conveys what's going on just fine
We don't need all the novel, line by line.

Gilbert Hernandez' FATIMA #1

FATIMA: THE BLOOD SPINNERS #1
Written & Illustrated by Gilbert Hernandez
Dark Horse Comics

What shambling metaphors these zombies are,
Such mindless need. But hey, that could be us.
So says that brightly shining comics star
Of all that wondrous Love & Rockets fuss.
This time a drug's responsible, addicts
Then kills and zombifies the taker, woes!
It's up to one tall supermodel chick
With perfect aim in that spine-spapping pose
To hunt them down, I guess? Though, to be fair
Small bands of Just Say No types roam the streets
A-trashing those for whom they just don't care --
Who cares? They're prob'ly zombies. Watch the feats
Of narcs in string bikinis and of our
Fatima show the meaning of girl pow'r.